My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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