i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
