it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
