walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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