so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
You pole danced in your parka.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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