There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
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