he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
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