So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Randomize
