You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Randomize
