He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
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