Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize