going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Randomize
