Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize