So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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