who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
