My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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