just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
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