his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize