I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize