duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
porn star boner night. come get it.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
