Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
ttyl tear gas
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
