remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
