oh god the rape fog is back!
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
