did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
