last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
