If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
