Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
