You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize