But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Congratulations! We have a period
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
