Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
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