I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
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