I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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