well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
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