Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
