I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Soap is not a condiment
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
You called me at 2am singing 'happy birthday' while screaming 'I fucking love you' verses, all while eating a burrito and taking a piss off your apartment balcony
Yeah I know, the people below me already told me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
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