So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
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