is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
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