The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
Randomize
