At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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