dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
Randomize
