yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
