Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
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