I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man, jail baloney is awful.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Randomize