Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
