Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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