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That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
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