why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
You've changed since you got that strap on