The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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