I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I had to cum in my sink.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
