Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
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