Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
