I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
