I bet he comes in French.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
3pm strippers are depressing
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
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